Another Doomed-To-Fail Project

Gaming Group

My two friends and I have shown an interest in starting a gaming group. I have tried this in the past. I started a group like this, and sure it "worked" for a month of two, but the problem was that too many people hitched on for a ride. A lot of people would ask to join the group, and I would not be able to refuse entry.

Anyhow, I think that this group has a small chance of actually working out. This time we are set on only having us in the group, and we are making an attempt to plan things out thoroughly before we actually launch the channel.

There's three of us, and we've all assigned each other tasks. Apparently I'm in charge of "social media" and assisting one other person on designing the logo and channel.

Game Reviews?

While we're still on the topic of gaming, why don't we talk about game reviews?

About three days ago I was scouring the web for a really original and creative game. Before we continue however, I'd just like to say that there are spoilers here, so if you were planning to play Digital: A Love Story, then please hit the back button now.

Let's continue the story. So I was searching the web for an original game and I came across Digital: A Love Story. The next hour would be one of my most emotional gaming ones, and immediately after I finished the game, I made this post.

This post really got me thinking. In short, the past few days I've actually been thinking about making a post every week or so that is also a game review. Before you start repetitively slamming your head on the table, hear me out. I am still not sure if I want to go through with this, and even if I do, I'll be sure to only review interesting games.

That's It

I am completely out of anything else to talk about, so this will be the end of the post.

Today I am a 7. It hasn't exactly been a great day, and it hasn't been a bad day. I'm just hovering around in the middle.

"We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them." - Khalil Gibran

I Just Died A Little Inside

My God.

I usually don't talk about games on this blog, but Digital: A Love Story really had me reevaluate a lot of things in life. I was solving puzzles and making what seemed like an endless amount of cross references. I felt happy, sad, desperate, and useless, all in the hour that I played the game.

Kudos to the developer of this game (Christine Love). Music was great, story was great, the ending was moving and heartbreaking (it killed a part of me inside). I was just on an absolutely wild ride while playing this game. I am really glad that I stumbled upon this game, and even more now that I have found that there are sequels to the game also developed by Christine Love.

Hands down, Digital: A Love Story is one of the best games I have ever played. Indie games come and go for me, but I know that this one I will always remember. If you're a sucker for love stories and a great plot, then you must try this game out.

Anyhow...

That is it for today I suppose. I cannot stress how much I am pleased with this game. It just has so many good things about it that I don't typically experience while playing games. Really goes to show how great an indie game is if time is spent on it.

Aside from games, life is still the same. I'm pretty anxious about getting my report card tomorrow, but hey, I have to get it some day. I am a 10. This game has stunned me. I am off to try the sequels.

"In three words I can sump up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost

I. Do. Not. Know. What. To. Say.

Nothing.

There is just nothing to really blog about anymore. I mean, my life just feels really empty (and I suppose that is good). With school there is always something that you are working towards, but when it's summer, it's like you lose all functionality and productivity.

Sometimes I wonder what will happen to me in terms of friendships. I find that I never really stick with a group of people or a person, but instead I travel like a nomad, wandering from group to group.

Don't say that I didn't try making close friends. In fact, I had two of them for what seemed like forever. But with them, it seemed like everyday that passed brought new surprises, and to me, everyday was a forever in itself. Like the Kevin I am though, I screwed up whatever friendship that we had and now there's always this uncertainty when we are around each other.

There's this one group of friends that I think is really just great. For some reason though, I feel like I don't really truly belong in the group, and maybe it's because I'm meant to always be on the fence, ready to jump off or content to sit down. I feel like I have also screwed up my friendship with this group.

Graduation Ceremony

Today I visited my elementary school, Begbie, to attend the graduation ceremony. I had a really good time seeing old friends and talking to some of them. Some old friends will remain that way, just old friends. I know that there's a slim chance that anybody (besides Tyler) who graduated from Begbie today reads this blog, but if you do, then I'd like to say that it's been my pleasure to have known you for the majority of my life.

Boring Post

Go somewhere else and read something more interesting than this.

I am a 9 for reasons.

"Sanity is a cozy lie." - Susan Sontag

School's Out

Finally.

So school is finally out, and I don't know what to make of it. I feel like it's great that I have nothing to do, but then again, I feel like this summer will be either a really unproductive one, or a really bad one. My friend Benson and I very briefly talked (more like Tweeted) on collaborating on making a program with C++, and that might take up most if not all of my summer.

It's funny how I'm still not sure what I am doing this summer. When you look at the big picture, there's only about two and a half months of no school, but that seems to fly by really quickly. Hopefully I won't be spending all my time inside.

Where I'll End Up

I wonder a lot (and I suppose in general people do as they grow) about where I will end up in life. My parents say that what I'm doing right now, I'll just be a regular person or worse when I grow up. Some people in my life see potential in me, and they think that I should stop dedicating so much time to gaming and more to work. And then some friends just see a lot in me, whatever I do.

Honestly, any of those three could happen. It'll get more clear as I go through my life, but as of now, I'm not even sure what I'm doing tomorrow, let alone what I'll be doing 15 years from now.

Image by CrisVector

Change

When I look back at what type of person I was at the start of grade eight, I see a very different person. At the beginning of the year, I was running pretty low on confidence. I didn't have many friends, and I felt like I would just be another person in the crowd. I hung out with a certain group that had members come and go, but in the end there were three people who were my first friends at Alpha.

And now it's the end of the year. One of those friends has moved away to another country, while another I have grown disconnected with. The third one is now one of my closest friends, as he was in the beginning of the year.

Everybody changes. For better or worse.

End Of Post

Coincidentally this is my 250th post and I have also broken the 16K views mark. I feel pretty good that I have managed to keep this blog running and alive this whole time, and I hope that there will be more years to come.

I feel like an 8. I know I'm in for the easy run this summer since I will have minimal work and I'll be able just to kick back and relax. Summer has never seemed so great to me.

"Tomorrow is always fresh, with no mistakes in it." - Lucy Maud Montgomery

Almost Grade Nine

The First Year Has Passed

After school tomorrow, the first year of five will pass. It's going to be great to be grade nine next year, but as we grow older, we leave the past lives that we used to live behind us, forgotten and neglected.

Today was kind of like a last day type of theme. Although we still go to school tomorrow (it's just all our blocks are shortened to 25 minutes), I cannot help but feel like today was our last day together as grade eights. Next year we'll have changed through the summer, most of us for the better, while some of us will fall.

All in all, it's been a great first year for me.

Groups

I've been in a lot of groups. The things about groups though, are that you get to know people. This is natural of course, as you interact with everybody. But the thing is, most groups split because of one reason. Relationships.

Say you've got this nice little group of four people. Two guys, two girls, just to make it even. We'll call them Boy 1, Boy 2, Girl 1, and Girl 2. So say Boy 2 and Girl 1 get to know each other, and then they start dating. Sure, it's all great for a while, but then, all of the sudden, they break up. They don't want to talk to each other or see each other, and the group slowly disintegrates until it is nothing but a faded memory.

It's sad what feelings can do.

Wrap This Post Up

Sorry for the boring post. Thought it would just be obligatory to put one up since I haven't in a while.

I'd have to say I'm a 7. There's still a lot of things I need to settle in life, and not until after that then I can really just enjoy life.

"Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it." - Thomas Fuller

Four More Days

Four More Days Until School Is Over

The end of the school is coming up, and while I might be sad that I won't be seeing my friends over the summer, I am more relieved than anything. I hate to admit it, but I have been throwing these past few weeks away into the trash can. I've got two major tests coming up in the next two weeks, so if I can make it past those, then I'll be fine.

I wonder what I will do in the summer. I have not enrolled for a summer school course (and frankly, I don't want to be in one), and I'm not quite sure what my plans are. Lying around in the summer heat sounds perfectly fine to me.

Younger Selves Are Always Stupid

I think a lot about how stupid and immature I was before. A year ago, I was thinking, "I'll never do the things I did in grade seven again." I'm thinking now about all the stupid things I did in high school and everything before that.

So does this mean that we're stuck in this endless cycle where we'll always reflect on our younger years as being stupid? Or does it just mean that until we really learn from our decisions, we will continue to have stupid years before us? It's a question that can only be answered from age.

Endless

It feels like everything will be always like it is. I'll be in my current state, always like this, never changing. It feels like that way for some weird reason. It's like there is nothing to look forward to in life but more struggle, but without struggle you don't get the sense of accomplishment.

Lately people have been poking fun at my blog and I wonder why. Leave if you don't like it. I'm a 5 today.

"The supreme accomplishment is to blur the line between work and play." - Arnold J. Toynbee

Stupid Things

Electronic Cigarettes

So the latest "trend" at our school is this electronic cigarette. People have taken up to it, now smoking it in the hallways and making (in my eyes) a failed attempt to look cool. I can't help but just pity those people. Either they are peer pressured or just want to look "cool" for some reason.

I find it incredibly stupid how people who I thought would not fall for this have fallen. I honestly do not get why people do these things. People who I thought were mentally strong have instead crumbled and succumbed to the electronic cigarette.

I hear people talking about it all the time. Students. Friends. I hate how everybody is doing this because it really is just so idiotic. I hope this goes away soon enough.

New Students' Council

The new Students' Council members seem to be really great people who are genuinely involved in the school and truly want to help the school. I've met a few of them (most of them at the "conference" today), and most of them seem to kind of "respect" Janelle and I (even though we only have one year of council experience) and the senior members.

It makes me feel really sad that all these people will be graduating soon because I think that we'll make a really good council.

Goodnight

I don't have much else to blog about. The last few days have been neutral for me, although there's always this one thing that's bothering me. It's just that little thing that stays constantly at the back of your head, reminding me every minute how I have to think about it. It's tiring at times, but maybe thinking about it isn't bad.

I've had a nice day today for once. I finished some errands and I feel like I have done my part for today. I'm an 8. Goodnight.

"Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor." - Truman Capote

There Isn't Enough Time

Time

There is this wonderful quote from Mitch Albom's The Time Keeper.

"Man alone chimes the hour. And, because of this, man alone suffers a paralyzing fear that no other creature endures. A fear of time running out."

This explains life perfectly. It's the reason why we are in a rush to get somewhere or do something. It is because we are afraid of running out of time. Except that it's these little fears that are all part of a bigger fear. The world is constantly reminded of the time, and in return we have all these deadlines we must meet and things to do within an allotted time.

Imagine a world without time.

Brain And Heart

Some say that the brain and heart go hand in hand while others say that they are conflicting organs in your body. As of late, the conflicting organs theory has proven itself to me. People change and we feel differently about people.

It's amazing to see how much my perspective of a person has changed. At the beginning of grade eight, I thought that I would never ever fall in "love" with this particular girl. A whole year zooms by and nine months later, I'm starting to rethink that statement.

If the brain and heart both are capable of loving, where the brain is the more logical love, and the heart is a just-do-it love, then I'd be correct in saying that I was listening to my brain at the beginning of the year and now I'm listening to my heart.

Along with others, I have also changed.

Nostalgia

I long for the days when I had my old friends. I can no longer call any of them friends, except for a few that I still keep in touch with (but even they are slowly drifting away). I want days where I wasn't stuck in a hole of homework that I had created myself. Mostly, I want days where I can be a kid again, but there is no turning back in that realm of life.

There is this project that is due tomorrow. And all my science homework. And a short story. I have roughly 17 hours to finish all of this. I also need to sort out this mess that my brain and heart have created. I am a lowly 7 today.

"Time was passing like a hand waving from a train I wanted to be on. I hope you never have to think about anything as much as I think about you." - Jonathan Safran Foer