My Apologies

Once Again

Because I am Kevin and other various factors, I have not blogged for a while. I don't know if you have really cared that I haven't, but I figure that you'd like to know if you are a regular reader.

Anyhow, once again there will be very few posts for an undetermined span of time, and I'd just like you to know that (just in case if you think I've quit on blogging or something like that). I'm not sure when I'll get back to blogging on a nearly daily basis, but if I do, I'll be sure to tell you.

Out Of The Way

Now that's out of the way and I can continue on. I'd also like to apologize for any typos that you may come across as spell check is not always the best and it is difficult to type on a small keyboard.

But that's my issue.

School is almost here. I'm actually glad that school will be back in session soon enough and that there will be a new wave of students in the school. I can only hope that they will be nice.

I am kind of anxious as to see where my friendships have gone as I believe I have changed considerably over the summer. Most friends will remain friends, but I think that it is more difficult to maintain a good friendship with close friends than it is with regular friends. My type of thinking I suppose.

Goodbye For Now

Hopefully I'll have to stop composing blog posts on a small tablet soon enough. There doesn't seem to be a function for adding images (and I'd be too much of a novice off a computer) so expect short word-only posts until whenever.

If you point out a typo I'll try to fix it, so thanks in advance for that.

Hm. What else? I guess there's nothing left for me to say (besides my number of course). Anyways, thank you for reading today and I will see you (not literally) in the next post. I am currently a 7.

"Some of us may find happiness if we quit struggling so desperately for it." - William Feather

A Dodgy Aventure

Still Going On

It's almost been two years since I set off to start this blog and somehow I've managed to hang on without succumbing to the lack of viewers and the dullness of my blog. I'm really glad that this blog is still going on and I hope that it will be able to continue on so I can cherish and laugh at it in the future.

Anyhow, I have few friends who actually own a blog, let alone update it on a consistent basis. It feels like we're this little group of pioneers venturing out, trying to find a home in the vast land of blogging. If we settle in, then others will be sure to follow.

The reason why I speak of this so suddenly is because truthfully, I'm a bit worried that some of my friends have "given up" on their blogs. They may have their own reasons that I am not aware of, but from my perspective they just haven't blogged for a while (then again, their idea of "a while" may be different from mine).

So yeah, keep your head up and keep blogging. Doesn't matter if nobody reads it (I will if haven't already shared it with me), but if you don't blog for yourself, you shouldn't be blogging. That's just my opinion.

An Adventure

This morning I headed over to my grandma's place in Vancouver because nobody was home to watch my brother and I (or something like that, I actually do not know) and what I didn't know was that I was about to embark on a very bizarre and tedious adventure.

So I went over and ate, watched some television, and did other things (such as failing at trying to use a yo-yo). Around 1:00 p.m. I decided that I wanted to take a walk because I actually enjoy taking walks in my old neighborhood. A lot of important memories come back and I don't loose my "roots". Typically I don't take walks around my elementary school area because I live in Burnaby, but (as I said beforehand) I was in Vancouver today.

For an hour or so I didn't do much. I walked around the area, smiling and laughing inside while enjoying and reliving the memories I had forgotten. Around 2:15 p.m. (or something like that) I started thinking about getting back home. So I started to head home, when I stumbled upon this little dog.

It had a black coat and was a small breed of dog (although I believe it was not a Chihuahua). No collar, and no owner in sight. This couple was walking in front of me, so I didn't want to do anything in case they wanted to handle the problem of a stray dog. They stopped when they saw the dog and talked about it as I walked past them. I walked a bit more slow and heard them try to coax the dog into their care (I assume they wanted to find the owner as well), however I also heard them give up and continue walking.

Me being me, I turned the corner (yes, in the opposite direction of the house) and tried to intersect the dog at the next block, however to my surprise the dog had already passed the block and was already on another. I decided to follow it for a while, because I wanted to make sure it wasn't gobbled up by coyotes or anything (just me being an idiot). Anyways, I tried to get it to follow me instead, but it wouldn't even go within two meters of me.

Honestly, I have no idea how long I spent following that dog. It randomly looked back at times to see if I was still following it and I was really worried about it. It crossed the road whenever it wanted and I'm wondering how much destruction and chaos he's caused already.

You're probably wondering, "So when did you stop following him? Did you find his owner?" First off, I did not find its owner. It may still be wandering around the streets of Vancouver. God help that dog. I really don't want that little guy to be eaten up by a coyote. Secondly, I stopped following him after he turned into an alley and disappeared. It just so happened that today, out of all days, was the day when P.N.E. (or Playland, they're both the same to me) had a free admission gate day. So naturally the alley was full of cars that the dog could hide under.

And that's my little adventure for today.

Things That Bother Me

There are a lot of little things that bother me (please don't think of that as a sexual joke). For example, one of those things happens on an almost daily basis. I believe you know (if you have been reading this blog since the start of summer or later) that my parents bought me a pass to make me guilty enough to go swimming everyday? Good.

So I go to the pool almost everyday. I walk in, scan my card, and then the counter person (I'm having a bad time remembering the name) puts a wrist band around my wrist. I was brought up to be polite (at least I try to be most times), so I always say thank you (except in my case it's a "thanks").

What bugs me? The fact that most of the time, I never get a "You're welcome." Silly thing to be bugged about right? I don't know. It feels like whenever they don't respond it's either they don't care about my "thanks" or some other reason.

I'm an 8 today. I've had a lot of these days lately. Once again, sorry for no images.

"Love is like a faucet, it turns off and on." - Billie Holiday

Just A Little Filler Post

On The Quest To 300

This will be the 274th post on this blog (not saying much though, since it is really just a filler type of post), which means that there are still over 26 days of blogging left (once again, not saying much because I don't blog on a daily basis).

If you get tired of filler posts that really have no good content in them, then you should leave now and head over to this site.

To anybody who has stayed behind and not clicked the link, please bear with me as I struggle to come up with half-decent topics to discuss in this post. I know I've made a lot of dim-witted posts in the past (probably the majority of them are like that), so by now you should be used to seeing something like this.

Provincial Exam Results

So unfortunately I still have not received any news of what my score is on the exam. I signed up for some sort of EdAccess account and tried looking for it to no avail. However I should get the results of my exam before the school year starts (which is relatively soon), so maybe it's better if I don't know it for now.

Obsessed

Over the summer I guess you could say I've become kind of "obsessed" with anime. I think most of my obsession is because there's a lack of anything else (that I consider) interesting. I find that I actually enjoy watching anime more than living my own life (not all times, just some times) because my life becomes much more dull during the summer. It's also nice to kind of see what it'd be like in another type of world.

I had a whole lot of text typed up about this anime that I've been watching (and dying to tell somebody about) and how I enjoyed watching harem and how some harem anime had unrequited love. Then I started shifting and getting off topic (as I usually do) and then talking about unrequited love instead of how much of an anime lover I've become. So I scrapped all of it and replaced it with this skimpy paragraph.

Filler Post End

Pretty soon this will become a legitimate post if I continue writing, so I will stop myself here.

What can I say? I'm nervous about my Provincial mark and I'm begging the days to pass by slower until school comes rolling along (and at that point I'll wish the days are as fast as now). Summer is almost over and I'm anxious to a new year of school and a brand new wave of recruits from the local elementary schools. Today I'm feeling like a 9. It's been a nice and fulfilling day I guess.

"Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light." - Helen Keller

Things On My Mind

People And Jobs

It's natural for the ordinary person to have to search for a job at one point of his or her life. Jobs are the things that give us the finances in order to survive. Some people are fortunate enough to get the jobs that they enjoy and gain a sense of... satisfaction from. Seeing a result of your work is one of the greatest things that you can experience, whether it's a small puzzle you've put together or a novel that you finished writing.

But if there are people who get the jobs that they want, there are surely people who do not get the job they want?

First impressions really make an impact on the observer. Although they are not always 100% accurate, they have a lasting effect if it's a one time meeting.

In grade six, I went to a camp of some sort (I now unfortunately do not remember the major events of that camp, but I'm sure I had an amazing time) with my class and a few others. We were going throughout the day cycling stations and at one point of the three day camp my group and I ended up at the cooking station.

Cooking was merely just making smores over a fireplace, nothing to get over-excited about. Now my memory gets fuzzy when I think about what happened, so bear with me if you were there and I recall something wrong.

What I remember is that my group was finished with the station and it was a free block (or something like that). So we split into our little groups and went off. I also remember it being very cold and rainy (at one point at least) and that brought a little group (including me) to the fireplace (yes, where the smores were made). We were cold and wanted to warm up, so we asked the cooking station guide if we could start a fire. She immediately turned us down, being somewhat angry and dismissed herself.

As she walked off, I remember one of us (I can't say who because I would like to protect this person's identity on the off chance that the particular guide I'm talking about stumbles upon this post) said something along the lines of, "She should quit her job if she's unhappy with it."

It's funny how a memory like this can come back to me while I'm sitting in the hot tub at the swimming pool looking at the unhappy face of a life guard.

Who knows? Maybe the guide (and the life guard) was just having a bad and miserable day. She might have been a really nice person if we got the chance to meet her and spend time with her. And that's why I like to make good first impressions that last.

I've kind of wandered off topic here. I suppose what I'm trying to say is that if you have a job that you really dislike, I feel... bad (I don't know if that works) for you. It must suck to go to your work everyday only to get back unhappy.

Provincial

Sorry for jumping from place to place while talking about people and jobs. I figure that it kind of fits together in the end, so I won't change it. I'll also apologize for another post without images. I have no idea if you don't mind or if you do, but I will try to put some up in the next post.

Anyhow, if you have been curious about the result of my Provincial exam, then here's the part for you.

The Provincial exam was... honestly not that difficult.

Hold up here though. This is from my perspective and I still don't know what I got on the exam, so I might just end up thinking that it was easy but end up looking like an idiot at the end of it all.

But yeah, I didn't have a lot of trouble with the exam (provided that it was multiple choice and was also an e-exam). Overall I feel good about the outcome of it, although I'm apprehensive as to what percentile I got on it.

The End Of This Post

So those are my thoughts for today. Nothing really out of the ordinary, just the usual.

I heard about biometrics in a song I was listening to. It seems like a really interesting topic that I would like to talk about in the future (if I can ever find something to apply it to). Maybe I'll put up something about that in the near future. Anyhow, to conclude my post as per usual, I will give you a number that doesn't really mean much. That number (for today) is an 8.

"Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree." - Martin Luther

Friends...?

Wait, Aren't I Supposed To Be Studying?

If you're wondering why there is a post before the Science Provincial exam, well, I suppose I got bored and I actually had something to blog about. That should be reason enough? Sometimes I don't even know where I'm going with this blog...

Anyhow, onto the actual topic I was going to blog about.

Over the summer, it feels like I've become worse as opposed to becoming better. I'm sure the majority of people set out to reach their goals by becoming better at something. So why do I feel so... bad about myself? Friends. Or should I say ex-friends? I have no idea where I stand with certain people.

So you're wondering why I am pondering on this topic yet again. Well, to put things simply, I got into a fight with another friend and now it seems that I've lost two friends? The problem is that I never have the guts to actually face my problems and let them go, as if they'll disappear magically (oh only if they could). This bad trait of mine has caused me trouble in the past but it still seems that I haven't learned my lesson.

And that's why I just reach out to people on this blog.

Summer Really Is A Sad Time

I think I'll actually be glad when school goes back in session. Maybe it just feels like I've been missing out on way too many things. I enjoy being around friends and in a great environment and school provides that, no matter how many people say that they'd wish that school never existed. For me I wish that this summer never happened. Maybe if it never happened, I would still be friends with those two people (maybe we are, but I have no idea). I wouldn't be going to a brand new class full of people older than me. Then again, how do I know that this summer is a bad thing? Maybe it will be or trigger one of the best events in my life.

The thing about broken things, like friendships, is that if it isn't already obliterated into pieces, you can still salvage some part of it. Sure, there will be a few cracks and missing pieces here and there, but you've still got something out of it. That's it for this post. I'd like to believe I'm a better number, but right now I feel like a low 7.

By the way, I did study for the exam if you're really that concerned about the outcome of it (I know my family is).

"Men tire themselves in the pursuit of rest." - Laurence Sterne

Provincial Exam Studying

Provincial This Thursday

I'll be heading over to North this Thursday to take my Science 10 Provincial, so there probably won't be a post up until after the exam (just a heads up for anybody who still reads this blog). Truthfully, I just came to the realization that I actually have to try for this exam and that it isn't just another test at school that I can wing.

So my plan is to settle down the next few days and spend solid hours everyday studying for the Provincial and testing myself. It's actually quite a shame that I have the Provincial so soon because I just got hooked on this anime (The World God Only Knows) and I'm already on the third season (although it's a bit confusing without watching the OVAs). But at least I'll have something to look forward to after the Provincial.

Clingy People

I really really really really really dislike clingy people. By clingy people, I mean the people who cannot leave your side no matter what and ask for help with the simplest tasks. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that you need to be independent. I'm just saying that I really dislike clingy people. For some reason it's just the feeling of being focused on too much.

Not that I know that many clingy people, but I have met some in my life. It's just that after a while they become more of a burden than somebody who is looking up at you as a role model.

Nothing Much Else

A lot still hasn't been cleared between my friend and I and I really don't know what's going on. I'm not exactly good with people when there's and unsettled feel to everything. I probably mentioned this a while back, but I like planning out my conversations beforehand. The majority of lines that I say have probably already been run over in my mind several times. Over thinking you could say.

The problem lies in me being to afraid to approach this person because I don't know how she's going to respond. I wish I could just do nothing (and maybe I can, but I have no idea).

Goodnight

I tried studying for the Provincial by taking the practice test, but it turns out it's the same test I took twice in my summer course. I guess it's just going to be solid reading for me.

Once again, sorry for the lack of images. Either I'm too lazy or there aren't any images that are not corny and actually relevant to what I'm blogging. Whatever. Anyways, that'll be it for this post. Glad you stopped by to check on this blog. Uhhh, today I'm an 8. I've been feeling like an 8 for the past few days.

"Information's pretty thin stuff unless mixed with experience." - Clarence Day

An Explanation

Why I Haven't Responded

There's been a lot of fuss lately over my last post when I wrote about high school relationships. I didn't want to write up a post because I didn't have an ideal way of approaching this problem, but now I suppose I have something like a solution. More of an explanation really.

I want to get a few things clear first to any people who took my view on high school relationships in the wrong way. First off, that is not how all high school relationships are. There are exceptions and the way that I worded my view made it sound like everything I said was in stone. I know that it is not and I'm sorry for doing that. The second reason is why I wrote like that in the first place. While writing up that part, I felt like I was writing a romance novel, and in a way, I turned it into one.

Anyhow, I'm going to put all of this in the past. It is the past after all. If you are unable to do so, then don't. You can just stop reading. It's really my fault for saying something so misleading. I hope this cleared up some things.

The Witch's House

I had a bit of excess time yesterday because my course was ending (in fact, it ended today), so I decided to play a game for another review. Without further ado, here is my take on The Witch's House.

The Witch's House is yet another puzzle game, this time though, it's centered around a horror theme. It is a RPG Maker VX freeware game that was created by Fummy.

Obviously any games I put up here have been amazing to me, and this game is just one of the scariest games I have played in a while. One of the best features of the game is the suspenseful atmosphere it manages to keep on at all times. Not for one moment did I feel safe. You think that solving puzzles is difficult enough, but it just becomes unbearable when you're running away from giant skulls and red-eyed teddy bears.

I really enjoyed The Witch's House. RPG Maker games never fail to amaze me because it shows that simple interface can be enhanced immensely by amazing developers. It was a genuinely scary game and the story was not one bit uninteresting. The game and required RPG Maker VX RTP are available on this site for free. After finishing the game I was left scared, wanting more, and also sad at the same time. That's when I realized that there is more than one ending. Can you get all of them?

That's It For This Return Post

Feels like I haven't blogged in a really long time. I suppose in a way that I haven't. My summer course ended today (as previously stated) and the Provincial is looming over me (although I now feel much more confident about taking it). With school over, it feels like I now have the time to enjoy the rest of the summer break and reorganize myself again.

I also finished the anime My Little Monster either yesterday or the day before and I really loved it. The anime was just great and I think I needed some comedy and romance in my life. But then again, those two go hand in hand. Unfortunately after doing some searching I couldn't find news on a second season (which I dearly want) and I guess there won't be one because the manga is also coming to an end. Finishing good anime always leaves a void in me. It's really a shame that a lot of the ones that I've watched and love won't have a second season.

Sorry for keeping you here for so long. Maybe blogging at more spaced out intervals is a better idea since I have more time to really think about what I'm going to blog about. I'm an 8 today.

"Immature love says: 'I love you because I need you.' Mature love says: 'I need you because I love you.'" - Erich Fromm

Summertime Sadness

No, Not The Song

I'm not talking about the song by Lana Del Rey (it freaks me out honestly), but if you were looking for that, you can still find it here and add another view to the 70 million or so views the video has. If you're not looking for that song (or you were looking for the song and some other form of summertime sadness), then read on.

A lot of my friends have seemed really down lately. It feels like these people realize that it's a low point of their life and I'm glad that some of them express in it in their blogs because then I know how to approach that person better (also their ideas spark new ones for topics in my posts). Summertime sadness seems to hit everybody at one point of their life and most low points seem to occur during high school because that's when we are most aware of them. We focus on these low points and on nothing else. As I've said before, it's like you drive into a ditch and then you furiously try to drive yourself out, but only unsuccessfully dig yourself deeper into the ditch.

Relationships

After only a year in high school, I've seen plenty of relationships start. The first few days you and your "significant other" are everything and anything that people talk about. The two of you adore each other and spend every moment possible with each other. Eventually you start talking to other people and distance yourselves a bit.

Then start the doubts. That's the problem with most high school relationships. Doubt. A healthy relationship won't last if there is doubt in it. That's why most high school relationships don't last. They're just something that you do to get the experience. Doubt kills couples. Always has, always will.

Doubt only grows and thrives on secrecy and soon it eats you inside out. You suddenly don't feel secure about your relationship and ask the other about it, only to provoke him/her. Then you feel insecure about everything, not only your relationship. And then you break. Whether it's mutual, or you did it, or the other did it, the end result is two broken people.

It's always the hardest after a break up. You're broken and you're looking for your other half. You feel pangs in your heart whenever you see the other. It doesn't mean you still love the other person, but you feel awkward and embarrassed. Everything you had to do with the person, memories, chats, all of it disintegrates and soon it seems like it was never there.

But it gets better. You fall in love with other people and slowly forget your past.

Eventually that person just becomes another face in the crowd. You don't value his/her opinion or friendship as much as you used to. You think about how stupid you were in picking that person and smile because now your heart is healed and available to others to love.

You're wrong though. Scars. They stay there forever, causing your heart to droop like a wilted rose. You think about what if you had stayed in that relationship. Where would you be? You regret. You feel the loss and pain. Suddenly you want to be in a relationship with that person, just to give it one more shot, but you know that you just can't bring yourself to it. You fall into despair because you thought you were done with the other, but maybe you aren't. Maybe you never will be.

However there is hope. Scars fade. They don't hurt as much as they used to, but they still hurt. You can live with that though. People will love you in the future. They will see those scars and the burden that you carry on your back. The cowards will run away because they want to love somebody without scars and luggage, but the people who truly love you will smile, ask you where and how you got your scars and help you carry your luggage.

High school relationships. We drive blind and stupidly into them, in a futile race to grow up and end up crashing.

But hey, that's my opinion on this. You believe whatever you believe. This is what I think. I might be wrong, I might be right, or a mixture of both, but in the end, it just comes down to what you and I think.

First Impressions

I had a whole bit written on first impressions and how some people in my school just seem really ignorant and kind of just have a negative charisma, but I scrapped it because it didn't sound right (especially coming from me). I was kind of channeling out my personal feelings and beliefs about these people, and I figure that others may have really opposed my opinions, so I deleted the whole thing.

I'm really sorry about the plain text-only images. They were quickly made by me just because I felt like this post was too long to not have any images. So I had to make-do with these. I'll try to find relevant images next post. I'm an 8 today. Thank you for inspiring this post. You know who you are.

"A life spent making mistakes is not only more honourable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing." - Geroge Bernard Shaw

Great Week

In Terms Of... Everything

It's been an absolutely fantastic week. There is so much that I have discovered from games, anime, and being some what independent. I shed a few tears, had some laughs, scares, and just lived life. It's hard to believe that I've been missing out on so many things and it's sad to think that I might never find things like the things I've found this week. So let's have a recap post shall we?

Ib

A post or two ago I reviewed the game Ib and absolutely loved it. It was just great in a lot of aspects and left me in awe. Anyhow, Ib has really opened my eyes to a new genre of gaming and I just really want more of the game, but unfortunately it's over. I was really glad I discovered the game and now I'm looking forward to other games that have been made with RPG Maker.

A lot of indie games turn out really good and Ib is not an exception.

Angel Beats!

Every once in a while I have a day where I just put everything aside and watch anime for the whole day. Yesterday was one of those days and the anime I had planned to watch was Angel Beats! thanks to recommendations from a friend and other anime watchers. So I set up, got comfortable, and started the anime.

I loved it. I ended up watching Angel Beats! in one go and during the last scene I shed a few tears, not only because of the sadness and despair in the scene, but because I knew that the anime was going to end. As the credits started rolling on the screen I just sat back and thought about everything I had just experienced. Once the episode was done, I quickly searched the web for a second season (and as usual with anime I like) and found nothing but hoaxes.

So I'm sad that Angel Beats! doesn't have a second season, but I hope that one day in the future there will be something like a second season (at best) and an OVA or two. Angel Beats! just left a void in me that I can't seem to fill up unless I watch something else like it.

Summer School

The biology unit of my summer course is finally over and now we're on our last unit (which is physics). I'm really glad about this because I had a bit of trouble with biology, but physics seems like a unit which I really enjoy and understand. I'm getting a solid 94% in the course (as of now) and, I don't know, humans usually tend to be happier when they understand things.

Review Site

Angel Beats! and Ib have really pushed me even further into thoughts about creating a review site. They both were really enjoyable and I feel like they deserved to be shared to world to anybody who haven't heard of them. Anyhow, so the possibility of starting a review site (more of a blog) grows larger and I'll keep updates on this blog. There are plenty of things going on in my life however, so there might not be enough time to start and run the site.

All This Made My Week

An anime, game, and knowledge just made my week. I'm typically a moderately happy guy most of the time, but those things really completed this week and (for the most part) perfected it. Friends have been really good to me and, really, there are just so many voids from completing Ib and Angel Beats! because I still can't get over them.

I'm really hoping that Angel Beats! will become something more (or there will be a remake it), but if it doesn't (probably won't in the near future) then I'll just have to find a "rebound" anime. Sorry for keeping you here for so long. I tried to add pictures this time, but I find that sometimes it doesn't really matter. Today I feel like a 9 if you're still wondering about that.

"If you're going through hell, keep going." - Winston Churchill