Honesty

If People Were Honest

I wish people were honest. I know there are some honest people out there, but it's hard to find them. Then there are the people who are outrageously fake. This honesty problem gets so confusing for me that I usually end up doing something stupid and making a mistake. I think that a person isn't telling the truth because something has changed at that person, when that person might have just been telling the truth the whole time, but had something bugging them.

I wish I knew what people thought of me. What they know about me.

To the person I've been bugging these past few days, I'm really sorry (you know who you are). I know you probably don't check this blog as frequently as others may, but I hope that you will eventually see this post one day. We're hanging on a thin thread.

Writing Competition

I realize I haven't really written competitively (I don't think NaNoWriMo counts) ever, so I'm thinking about joining a local writing competition. The theme is "It's Possible", is for grades 8 - 12, and needs to have less than 1,500 words (along with a title). I'm kind of excited for this competition (although I'm not sure if I'm going to actually write anything decent).

Winter Break Relaxation

I was planning to relax this Winter, but it doesn't seem like I'll have that much time with the Science Fair, science homework, and just a bunch of other stuff that I'm trying as hard as I can to carry on my back. It feels like I'm trying to carry too much again.

I'm a 5. I don't really feel the spark of emotion inside me (and my wee bit of sickness may contribute to that) and I feel dead and useless. These next few weeks just may make me or break me.

"While I thought that I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die." - Leonardo da Vinci

Sometimes I Wonder...

If I Had Gone To Tech

Lately I've been contemplating a lot about what would have happened if I had gone to Tech. I would still know and be in daily contact with the people I grew up with, and I might have actually had an election for grade eight rep. If I had gone, I might have not met the great people at Alpha, but hey, who's the say I wouldn't have met some great people at Tech?

Things in life happen for a reason, and they do eventually explain themselves. It might only take a day, or it might take the rest of your life, but in the end, I believe there will be a time when you know why everything in your life was the way it was.

Might Do A Game Through Of Walking Dead: The Game

So recently my brother got Walking Dead: The Game on our iPad, so you know, I might do a game play on that and possibly put it up for TheEpicosityGuys. Still working out details like how to record it (probably just going to use the app Reflection) and if there's going to be commentary or not (but hey, what's a game play without commentary?).

Anyways, look for that in the future. If I do do a game play, I'll probably put the video on this blog.

Game Tomorrow

The Alpha grade eight basketball boys are playing against Mountain at a home game tomorrow (if you want to come, it's in the large gym after school tomorrow), so naturally I'm pretty pumped up about the game. We've got the jerseys ready, and although we haven't really played together as a team and developed our chemistry, I still have a lot of confidence in my team.

Be sure to look for number 11 if you do go.

Fun

This day has been pretty awesome. I learnt a few things about my friends and now I have a lot of security and confidence in my friendships. I just hope I won't loose this security.

Making oatmeal cookies tomorrow in Foods 8 in the morning, so that's another thing to look forward to. Alec showed me something really neat called Pomodoro and I might apply it to my life (by the way, he also linked me to a helpful Pomodoro timer) since you know, I need a lot more organization. I got a lot of stuff done today (still need to find my pencil case though...), so today I'm feeling great. Like a 9 great.

"Everything is theoretically impossible, until it is done." - Robert A. Heinlein

Something's Not Right

Life Seems To Alright

Ever since I've won student rep, I've gained a lot of responsibilities and also popularity. I regularly get people who say to me in the hallways, "Hey, you're that kid who was speaking." But as it seems as I'm getting more acquainted with the main student body, I'm losing my two best friends. So of course, life is great and all, I'm caught up with everything (except for that pesky Science Fair), but there's something that's just waiting to come out of the dark and stab me.

Realized I Haven't Blogged

I've been looking at my stats for this blog and I see that the views on my blog are dropping. I did a bit of cross checking and turns out I get more views on days that I post, so you know, of course, I want more people to know about this blog. I can do one thing to help that, and that is blog more, but you guys (or gals) can also help me out by sharing.

That'd be nice.

Copying Stargirl

I discovered that I've been fostering a rock collection for a while (now at 15 rocks) and I decided to copy Stargirl. So now I keep a certain number of rocks on the left side of my window, and a certain number on the right side. This number is more towards my personal and deep feelings, whereas the number I add to the end of every post is just my general outside feeling.

Anyways, I started this yesterday, so let's see how long I'll keep this up.

Goodbye

I have a lot of works and commitments that I've made, and I'm just being overwhelmed by everything. There are so many problems that just come after everything. Life is so difficult, even if these words come out of my mouth.

My number for today is a 7. I'm feeling lowly and gloomy. Too much pressure and commitments and such. There's just a really big problem too.

I need five more rocks.

"I just wanna hold your hand. Stare at you like you've got everything I need." - For Nights I Can't Remember by Hedley

My Future Adventures As Grade Rep

Speech Was Today

Today I went up as one of the two grade eight reps to give a little introduction speech. To be honest, I was kind of frightened by the crowd, but when I got up there, I got even more intimidated. I don't think I really showed my fear, but inside, I was just scared that they would reject me as a speaker and rep.

I had spent only a few minutes writing up the speech (roughly 600 words and two and half minutes long) the day before yesterday, yet after I finished speaking the first part, I realized that the rest would not be good enough. I had already got the crowd to laugh a little, so I needed to keep that off.

In my mind, I said, "Screw the script, I'm going improv." So I kept my speech folded in my free hand, and went off rambling about ideas from my speech, but not the actual words. After the crowd laughed a bit, I got more comfortable and started talking freely, just going freestyle if you may.

When I was done, I was a lot more pleased with my "performance" that I had expected. This speech built up my confidence and now I'm just really happy to be the grade eight rep.

Bursts Of Positive

I could have had a spark of positive while I was doing my homework (I felt dreadful while doing it for some reason, but don't a lot of people?), or I could have had it while I was eating. But this burst of positiveness occurred just as I stepped out of my shower. Weird huh?

Anyways, for a few glorious seconds I stood there, just thinking about all the great things in life I would accomplish, how I would go to UBC and tick of all my bucket list. Then in another few seconds it was gone.

Mood swings eh?

Plan To Blog More And Early Merry Christmas

TOWTAKZ is kind of dead lately, so I'm planning to blog a lot more (realized I hadn't put anything up for a long time). Hopefully Tyler and I will finally get together and start talking about restarting TOWTAKZ. Might also think about getting a new template for this blog. It's getting kind of... icky?

Just wanted to say to you guys to have an early Merry Christmas, since we all know the world is going to end on December 21, 2012. Stock up your food items people. Stay safe, and if you see a crack in the ground, don't step on it, because you know, you can break your mom's back and also start an earthquake.

I'm a 9 today. In high spirits because of the successful speech. Can't wait to finally do something as a student rep and help out the school. I've already got my second speech started. And my third. It's all in my head, I just haven't thought of it yet. Anyways, here's one of my lamer quotes.

"The best speaker isn't the loudest or clearest. The speaker can be quiet as a mouse. The speaker doesn't have to do anything. The speaker just needs to know what the people want and when they want it." - Kevin Zou

TBH

To Be Honest

All Facebook people who constantly fill my news feed, one word. STOP. Please just stop with all your silly "TBH"s and random comments. These things don't work realistically, but in our warped and messed up world, people go along with the "flow" and just "play along". We do not only "TBH"s, but also "20 questions", "LMS" and other random things.

First thing's first, "TBH" is for the most part, ineffective. I'm pretty sure the person who had the status that you liked is telling you lies. Well, honestly they're not lies, but that person is over exaggerating the truth. The second thing is that liking the status will only lead to more "TBH"s and nobody wants to have more than one "TBH" in one day from the same person (unless they're so insecure they essentially NEED the compliments). If you're going to do a "TBH", don't do it on Facebook, because to me, that's weak. You need the support of other people to compliment them. You can't compliment somebody without having something in it for you. Weak. And putting it in public view isn't helping my view on your "TBH"ers. That just shows that you want people to be like, "Awww! What a sweet comment!" and other lies like that.

Looking for useless likes on Facebook I find is really just... horrible. That's why I haven't liked any statuses on Facebook. Maybe one day there will be this AWESOME status that will most definitely deserve a like, but if it does, I probably still won't click that like button, since I know that the post is already so awesome, it doesn't even need a like.

I read this other blog very often (in fact, I have my little community of bloggers whose blogs I read and check on really what is just a daily basis), and the blog author put up a post including 20 answers to 20 questions about themselves. I found that to be a good idea, and I found it that way since I knew that person wasn't looking for likes, shares, or attention. She was just being her good old self.

That type of blogging is hard to find these days.

Well, That Seems To Be Enough

Usually when I type this much content, I get very tired and out of ideas, but for some reason I'm very ecstatic (to use a word I learnt from Natty's blog) and full of energy today. I hope you've enjoyed or at least changed your view on Facebook and people because of my "rant" on popular statuses.

Remember the last post? I was a 5 I believe. Today that number has multiplied by 1.8, if you wish to be exact. So if you do the math in your head (or just take out the calculator), then that makes me a good old and more or less normal 9! Things have calmed down quite a bit, and I'm really glad they did. Anyways, sorry for boring you with my post if I did, but you know, I just had to say it somewhere, and as my friend Philman says, "If you wouldn't say it on your blog, don't say it in life."

"Nobody got anywhere in the world by simply being content." - Louis L'Amour